I read an article the other day that left me going, "Hmmmm????" It was geared towards how our American society views certain child rearing techniques somewhat in a backwards way. Co-sleeping was one of the topics that was touched on in the article.
I have three children and I have never co-slept, before now. My third child, who is now 19 months sleeps half the night in her bed, and half in our bed....okay, sometimes more than half. I have always felt somewhat guilty about this, like I was not teaching her independence. Now after reading this article, and examining my child, I have to wonder if I have in fact been teaching her more independence than she would have if she did not co-sleep. Hmmmm...
First and foremost, here is the article titled, "Have American Parents Got It All Backwards?" It sites the Japanese culture and their beliefs on co-sleeping. The Japanese are very supportive of co-sleeping and the notion that it fosters independence by feeding the need for nurturing and closeness at night. Children automatically feel loved, nurtured, and bonded through co-sleeping, and therefor will act more independently during the day, because that basic need is met. When they are ready, they will gravitate to their own bed. Hmmmmm...
I have to say, I feel like this article is certainly valid, and not because I am looking for an excuse to keep my toddler in me bed...well not solely because of that. I feel like I am benefitting sometimes by having her there also. I feel like we are exchanging some sort of great energy, bonding, recharging together. It is hard to put into words.
So for the time being, I plan on keeping her close, still encouraging her to sleep in her bed when she is okay with that, and letting her come snuggle up with Mommy and Papi when she needs that closeness and comfort. I will listen to her cues, not society's, when it comes to what is best going to meet her needs.
I would love to hear co-sleeping stories, or independent sleeper stories. I am always open to hearing what everyone else's experiences have been.
Hiya Jaime :) I co slept with Ray almost 100% for the 1st 3 months and frequently afterwards with a lot of bedtimes starting off with us falling asleep in his bed with him up to this day. Yes, we catch crap for it, But ive found that it helps him feel more calm and connected with us. And lets look at crazy American childrearing: most families work full time, both parents 8-9 hours or more if you add commute time. If you take out homework, bath and dinner...how much "close" time DO we spend with our kids nowadays? Mine definitely still needs that snuggle time and bedtime is the best time for him to feel snuggled. He falls asleep faster and sleeps better than a lot of the nights we don't stay in with him. I have always commented on how soundly he sleeps when with us as opposed to on his own. A wise woman once told me (;) he wont wake up through the night forever..ever met a teenager that didn't sleep?? haha..I'm just enjoying the snuggle and letting the naysayers talk to themselves.
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