On the weekends I watch Dr. Phil in the mornings. I love his no nonsense approach to helping people. I love the way he shoots from the hip, with the intention of helping people, but with the attitude that they can either take it or leave it.
This morning he had on a mother of 5 that has no relationship with her older two daughters, a craked relationship with her second to youngest child, another daughter, and is considered the fun mom by her two sons. She lets her sons throw parties in her home that involve underage drinking. The police watch her house because she is notorious for having huge parties for the teens with alcohol included.
It was heart breaking to me to hear her daughters say they just wanted a normal mom. What exactly is a normal mom? I wonder if I am a normal mom? If I am not, do my kids wish I was more "normal?" I hope not, because I am who I am, and I do my best to be the best mother I can to all three of them.
Being a parent is not a "job," despite the title of my blog. Being a parent is a choice, an obligation once that choice is made. It is both the most rewarding, and difficult relationship on planet Earth. When the position is taken as seriously as it should be, parenting is the most time consuming, emotion consuming, worrysome, tiresome, rewarding position ever. I really wish parents would more often stop and consider what parenting really involves.
We parents are raising, teaching, guiding, rearing the future of our society. We are enabling, empowering, molding, shaping the adults that will decide our futures as well as their own. We are raising the future doctors, lawyers, politicians, teachers, mechanics of the world. Somewhere out there a parent is raising a child that will grow up and murder people, is there something in their parenting that could prevent that path? Maybe, maybe not. Ultimately, when people reach adulthood they are responsible for their own actions. But we parents influence every aspect of our children's lives.
The way we parent influences how our children will make decisions, how they will eat, how they will be in relationships, how they study in school, how they drive a car. Parenting is the biggest, most important position of anyone's life. A parent should never, EVER take it lightly. Will we screw up, certainly, we are human and to err is human, right?!?! But here is the key, let your kids see you screw up AND take responsibility for your own actions. TEACH your kids how to be good adults, BY LEADING THROUGH EXAMPLE.
Devote yourself to yourself and your kids over and over again every day. Commit to doing the best for your family and yourself every single day.
Reach out to those in need. Reach out to that pregnant teen in your neighborhood, help her be a better mother, help her parents help her. Guide not only your own kids, but every child that comes into contact with your own.
Love those children, spend time with them, and guide them in order to help them grow into adults that are responsible, funny, healthy, and HAPPY.
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