Some Easy Drink Recipes for Kids

Happy Labor Day everyone! Whether you are grilling, or just chillin', I have some great drink options for the kiddos today. Don't get me wrong, the adults can enjoy too! I have a recipe for a blueberry smoothie, that has blueberries, bananas and yogurt. Also in the article are recipes for a tropical smoothie, a cran-orange chiller, and a strawberry smoothie.




There are many ways in which to enjoy being healthy, and making a round of delicious, fruity drinks for the family can be one. Berries are full of antioxidants, so add as much as your taste buds like! Bananas are high in potassium, and low-fat yogurt is a great source of protein. Make them all organic and you up the health ante even more.

Come back soon, when I post some great high protein, toddler friendly smoothie recipes....including one for avocado melon....avocados are a super food, and are amazingly healthy!

Enjoy, and HAPPY LABOR DAY!!

Mother's Day

Tis the season to celebrate our Mothers!!  So far I know one of my daughters is planning on making breakfast, and another is writing me a song.  The third is 19 months old so I am hoping that she sleeps through the night, that might be the best present ever. 

Mother's Day is a celebratory day that has been around for quite some time.  Many countries around the world celebrate Mother's Day.  Some celebrate International Women's Day instead, due to the commercial nature of Mother's Day. 

In the United States, our modern Mother's Day was first founded in 1914 by Anna Jarvis.  She held a memorial for her own mother in 1908, and led the campaign to create the holiday on our calendar.  By the time 1920 rolled around she was already disappointed in the commercialism of the holiday. 

Around the world different countries celebrate Mother's Day in many ways.  some countries use religious dates of significance as Mother's Day.  Other countries use dates of significance to women to celebrate moms, or women in general.  In Roman Catholic countries the celebration is centered around The Virgin Mary, the mother of all mothers. 

Some countries, like Germany and France, adopted a Mother's Day traditional celebration during times of greatly declining birth rates.  This was in an effort to celebrate the meaning of motherhood and show a support for women to create families and raise children.  They felt that by lifting mothers up, and showing support for them it would encourage more women to want to become mothers themselves.  The birth rate did come up, but it remains to be proven whether or not the creation of Mother's Day had any impact on that. 

In India, mothers are revered greatly by their children.  Mother's Day for them is a day to thank their mothers quietly for their love and devotion.  It is common in India for the cultural centers to have events to celebrate mothers, but their celebration is not religious in nature.  It is a time to honor moms through praise and cultural arts. 

The greatest irony of Mother's Day here in the United States is the fact that the woman who started it all, Anna Jarvis, was ultimately arrested for protesting the holiday.  She became so enraged at the commercialization by the card companies and florists that she literally protested the whole holiday and showed regret for ever having supported the notion in the first place. 

Mother's Day does not have to be filled with expensive gifts and flowers.  As a mom to three girls, when my oldest two ask what I want for mother's day, I answer to them the same thing every year, "I do not need presents, your love, and appreciation are more than enough."  This is true.  The fact that one is making me breakfast, and the other is writing me a song, makes my heart just melt.  They are putting so much thought and attention into their gifts.  They have been planning for WEEKS!!  It is just the sweetest, cutest thing ever.  They started giving me my gifts the moment they started talking about them, because they have not stopped.  It means so much to me to be so important in their minds. 

I wish you all a Happy Mother's Day.  This year, sit down and write your Mom a handwritten letter expressing your love and devotion.  We have the power to take the commercialism out of this and every holiday, we just have to make it a priority.  We have to take the commercialism out of our society first and foremost. 

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!!

Super Mom

This term gets bantered about quite a bit.  I have been called Super Mom by my husband, family, and close friends.  At first it actually made me uncomfortable, like it was a standard that I felt was impossible.  I felt like if they think I am SuperMom then where is there to go from there.

 

I have come to terms with a similar term, Super Mom.  There is a difference.  SuperMom without the space is a super hero that does not exist.  This is an idealic persona that every mom strives to be, kind of like the Barbie doll of the mom world. 

On the other hand, Super Mom indicates a mom that is super.  A mom that is loved and appreciated by her family and friends.  A woman that is flawed, and makes mistakes, but still does her best to do what is right for her kids.  She is every mom that loves her kids, her husband, and herself.  She is every mom that works, stays at home, or works from home.  She is every mom that puts the needs of her family on the top of her priority list, and does what she needs to in order to raise good, contributing members of society.  She is real.

 

Being a SuperMom is like trying to be Batman, you can try but somewhere along the way the costume is going to get really hot and uncomfortable and you may not be able to get out of the Bat mobile very well.  And good luck fitting your groceries or soccer equipment in that thing.  At some point those moms that portray themselves as SuperMom have to come back to reality, and realize that they are Super Moms just like the rest of us doing our best. 

It is time we let go of unrealistic expectations and levels of performance that are just plain unattainable.  Do your best, that is all that anyone can do, their very best.  To continue to perpetuate a life in which we teach our kids there is no room for error is to err anyways.  We have to teach our children that is okay to screw up, we are human, it happens.  It is what you do with it that really matters.  Live life, learn lessons from your mistakes and others'.  Treat others the way you wish to be treated and you cannot go wrong.  

It is important for our children to see us fall every now and again so they can watch us pick ourselves up and dust ourselves off and get back in the saddle.  They need to learn through example, and that example is always first and foremost their parents. 

So, I say, you can have the cape, the mobile, whatever super hero gadget or gizmo comes with the title.  You can have the super powers, including the x-ray vision.  You can keep the bat signal, the invisible plane, well wait, that would be really cool to have.  Especially with airlines charging so much to go anywhere nowadays.  Sorry, my train of thought derailed on me for a second there.  Anywho, keep your gadgets and gizmos, I will gladly keep my title of Super Mom over being SuperMom any and every day of the week.  I would rather be comfortable being me, flawed and imperfect, than to stress every day over trying to perpetuate a smoke screen of perfection.  It is far more fun and fulfilling this way in my opinion.   

Veggie Wednesday

Every Wednesday we eat a vegetarian dinner.  It is fun!  The kids love it, and it gives us a chance to really get creative with our food.  This is a picture of tonight's dinner.  It is a black bean veggie burger with eggplant chips on the side. 

I am really proud of this meal.  It was insanely delicious, and my kids loved it.  I love getting creative with food, and so does every member of my family.  We all love to cook.  My ten year old wants to go to culinary school and become a chef.  I could not be prouder of her. 

Every veggie on this plate is also organic, something else that is very important to us as a family.  We try to eat as organic as possible, and eat as many NON-GMO foods as possible.  We teach the kids the reality of food, processed food dangers, organic versus non-organic, what the heck GMO means.  They know it all.  But we also have moments where we just order a pizza and sit back and relax.  I want my kids to be well informed and make good choices, but I also want them to know it is not something that needs to be obsessive.  We cook 95% of our meals at home, actually probably more, but I am being conservative.  We encourage the kids to participate in meal preparation with us as well. 

My ten year old made breakfast for the family last weekend.  She made a nutty cornbread in which she incorporated walnuts into cornbread.  She said she wanted to use walnuts because, "they will add a buttery flavor, which will compliment the cornbread nicely."  Yes, she is ten years old.  I love her to death.  She is very aware for her age, she always has been.  I think she has a very old soul.  But, I digress. 

I tell my girls, find something you love, and make it your own.  They have each shown a desire to really take cooking to a whole new level, although the oldest seems to really want to run with the ball.  She is making her own cookbook.  I tell them both all the time, food has several important aspects.  It needs to nourish your body, it needs to be something you enjoy preparing, and it needs to have universal appeal if you are sharing it with others.  The colors, flavors, and textures are all important and must work together. 

Tonight's dinner was not just our typical veggie Wednesday, it was a wonderful, family meal prepared together, enjoyed together.  They praised my veggie burger to the heavens, they helped prep all the fixins' for the burgers.  They devoured every last morsel on their plates, and helped clean up afterwards. 

Food can bring a family together.  The family dinner should be alive and well in every household.  It is a vital piece to the puzzle that can mean so much to everyone in the family.  My girls will grow up remembering all the great meals we tried out together.  They will go on with their own families with the foundation of everyone in the kitchen, working and sharing together.

It is not just a meal, it is an event.  It is a memory that will last us all a lifetime.

Sooo It Happened Again.

Being a stay at home mom has some inherent BS that comes along with the title.  First and foremost is a feeling of complete and total disrespect from those that do not stay at home, would not stay at home, and think those of us that DO stay at home are lazy.  This happens more times than I care to even acknowledge.  It can come from other moms, from dads, husbands, neighbors, whomever.  It hurts, and I do not know if these people realize that how insulting they are being.

I get up between 5-6 every morning.  I start cleaning, making lunches for the kids, doing whatever household chores will need to get started.  I also make time to sit down and get online.  Yes, I really do.  Most of the rest of my day I will be chasing my toddler around while trying to clean my house, and teach her shapes and colors, cook for her, run errands, chauffer her sisters to and from school, etc.  So yes, I take some personal time and blog, check Facebook, whatever I want to do at O'dark thirty in the morning.

The rest of my day is centered around the tornado that is my toddler.  She does not like to nap, still nurses, and is a ball of energy.  I love her to the moon and back and would not trade a moment with her.  What I do trade is any sense of privacy, any hobby I had previously, any sense of freedom that I had without a toddler attached to my hip.  That is okay, I find my moments.  Yes, I wish they were longer and not at the ass crack of pre-dawn, but whatever.  I digress.

The last thing anyone in my life would call me is lazy.  I may take a lazy day on the weekend, or during the week and make up for it on the weekend, but I am one of the busiest people I know.  I manage my household.  I take the kids to school, pick them up, take care of any and all appointments that they need to be at.  I make their breakfasts and lunches, the hubby and I share dinner responsibilities.  We do not eat out.  I would say we have eaten out maybe 5 times in the last year...MAYBE.  We cook and eat at home.  It is time consuming, but it is our health we are talking about.

My house may not be IMMACULATE, but my mother in law tells me she has no idea how I keep up as much as I do and that she could not get done all that I do.  My friends tell me how clean and neat my house always is, and those two things together tell me I am doing a good job.  It may not meet everyone's standards, but have I mentioned the toddler that still nurses and does not nap??  Yeah, good luck....

My job is to manage a household.  My household runs relatively smoothly, without too many hiccups.  Sounds to me like I am a good manager....not a lazy, bon bon eating slug who sits around waiting for the house to clean itself. 

My 15 month old has an extensive vocabulary in both English and Spanish.  She knows sign language too.  She says please and thank you for everything.  Those things do not just happen.  Her stay at home mom makes them happen.  Could someone else teach my child these things, absolutely, but that would detract from our relationship, and bond her with someone else. 

I used to be a single, working mom, so please do not think I do not understand, I do.  I think it was easier then.  Yes, I said that.  I think it was easier for me then.  I cannot explain it, but I have other single Mom friends that have agreed with me, and others that think that statement is crazy.  But, I know I am not the only one who thinks it.

So the next time you see a stay at home mom and wonder what she does all day....smack yourself on the hand and give her a pat on the back for a job well done.

Money Saving Tips

Who does not want to save a few $$$ here and there, and everywhere!!  I know as a family of five with a single income it can be tight sometimes.  Especially following a time like Christmas, where spending seems to skyrocket even when you have a budget and do your best to stick to it. 

I have some money saving tips I would love to share, as well as asking you to post your tips in the comments section.  Any and all sharing of good information is always welcome.! 

One thing I have done is to download the grocery store apps on to my tablet.  Often they have electronic coupons on the app, and they keep track of what you typically purchase, so the coupons are geared towards what you actually buy.  Safeway goes one step further and puts the coupons directly on to your rewards card, so the second you scan your card at check out all the items you have coupons for are discounted by the value of the coupon.  Couponing was never easier than that!  I find since I spend a good deal of time online that online couponing is great, and actually helps me use those coupons, instead of clipping them only to be forgotten behind in my little organizer.  Let's face it, when trying to leave the house with a toddler and often the two older kids in tow, it is hard to remember my name, let alone the coupon organizer.  Having these money savers available electronically is a great help, and just shows that even the grocery stores need to evolve into the new age.  I signed up at sites like Red Plum that email me the coupon inserts that are received in the mail.  If I need to print them out I can.  But I only print the ones I intend to use, and bypass the others. 

I also sign up for email coupons at sites that I typically shop at for the kids clothing, like Kohls and Target.  I use the online coupons, and shop their sales to get the most for my money.  The other day between sales, coupons, and Kohl's cash I was able to get a jacket that retailed for $180 for $20.  I literally did a happy dance in the store.  I know couponing itself is no new idea.  But my point is that we need to become smart shoppers, not just shopping with coupons, but also finding the sales that go along with the coupons, and utilizing every deal possible to get the most bang for your buck. 

Another option that may not be all that popular is becoming a one car family.  For families that live in large cities this may not even matter if they do not own a car to begin with, but for us suburb dwellers a car is necessary to be able to adequately function.  I am a stay at home mom.  We are usually a two car family, but we are down to one car temporarily.  It has been a huge adjustment, I will not lie, but it is money saving.  I took the second car off the insurance until we can use it again, which cut the insurance bill in half.  The gas spent on the first car will surely increase, as will wear and tear, but if done correctly there should not be a doubling in those areas.  It is an option, and often a good one especially if we are talking about a one income family.

   Speaking of automobiles, another money savingn tip is to shop around for insurance when your renewals come up. Even if you do not end up switching insurance companies, the shopping can lead you to a lower price, and hopefully your current company can match the lower price. If not, it may be worth it to switch, if the savings is significant.

Cooking more at home is also a way to save money.  Not only is it healthier, but costs can be trimmed dramatically by some simple changes.  My children do not drink juice, but instead flavored water, that I flavor with real fruit.  I make apple cinnamon water, or cucumber lemon or lime water.  It is significantly less than buying juice, plus it is vastly healthier for them in the long run! 

 

These are just a few little tips.  Throughout the year I will be sharing more cost cutting, and money making tips.  I am making some large changes in my own life this year, and I will be sharing my experiences along the way.  Please feel free to jump in where you can, and I hope you take away some helpful information on our journey together.

The First Day of The Rest of My Life

Happy New Year!  Up and ready to roll out the first blog of the new year at 8:00AM this morning. 

I am dedicating this year to myself!  I am constantly doing things for others, which I love, but I put myself on the back burner way too often.  I am going to make myself my first priority this year.  I am going to set the example for my girls.  Like Dr. Phil says, "You teach people how to treat you."  This is insanely true.  If you find yourself constantly being taken advantage of, then you need to locate the welcome mat on your forehead and remove it. 

I am going to start TODAY and make some changes, and make my world a better place.  I have a lot to offer, and it is about time I did.  I am creative, funny, dependable, smart, and lots of other great adjectives.  I am going to make 2013 the year of the Mom.  And by Mom, I mean me. 

So stay tuned all year for the journey of my life.  The journey of my family's lives, and a whole lot in between. 

I am going to be talking, physical health, mental health, emotional health, and every other kind of health I can think of.  If you ever thought you were unfulfilled in some aspect of your life, stay tuned, because we are going to address that area this year.  Want to help me?  Then you have to be here, with me, in the trenches making it happen.  I welcome you, heart and soul. 

Ready.  Set.  GO!

Family by definition

Merry Christmas!!!!

I hope you all have a great Christmas! Nothing better than seeing your child jumping up anddown because they are so excited about their gifts. Makes a Mommy happy. I hope all your dreams come true. Happy Holidays!!!

Milk, DOUBLING in Price?!?!?!

You know, with all the talk about gas prices the price of many things nowadays goes almost unnoticed.  I came across an article about the price of milk and the potential for milk prices to double after the new year.  I almost spit out my milk...

What is the saying, "Don't cry over spilt milk."  Well if we are talking $7 a gallon, I will darn sure be crying over it!  To top it off, we buy organic milk.  So that increase in price will have us paying about $8 per HALF gallon.  Someone pass me a tissue.  I think we may be better off just purchasing a cow.  I will sell the milk to my friends and that sow will pay for herself in a couple months.  Now, if only I could convince the dog that the cow was a dog.  But seriously, the cost of everything is going up, WAY UP, and pay is not increasing, jobs are sporadic at best, and we keep hearing about how we are dangling off a fiscal cliff. 

How are we supposed to feel all peaceful and happy during the holiday season when so much of our financial future is in turmoil?  The article says there is still time for congress to act.  Oh geez, here we are at the mercy of these folks again.  Why is it whenever we are dealing with congress everything is a cliff, or a shutdown?  Why does it always come down to some state of emergency?  The need to act on these issues and act quickly and efficiently.  We do not need to be forced to pay exhorbitant prices for basic food items, like milk.  We are already paying through the nose for gasoline, health insurance, and everything else under the sun.  We need relief, not even greater increases in costs. 

So I say to congress, get it together people!!!  Fix our economy!  Fix our financial situation!!  Get together, work together, make it happen!!!  We put you all in office because we believe you can get the job done, so poop or get off the pot. 

Blended Families....

I struggle often with how my divorce has effected my girls.  I know they are better off, because their father and I were just plain toxic together towards the end.  I struggle with how things now are going to impact their relationships.  The anger and animosity still sitting there has to have some negative impact on them, and that kills me.

During the holidays this feeling is stronger inside.  The more I try to be nice, and rach out olive branches, the more I feel like they are yanked from my hands and used to smack me with over the head.  I just do not understand.  Holding on to ill will, holding on to anger, letting negativity eat you alive, it just is not healthy. 

I pray every day that the kids continue on the paths they seem to be on in spite of everything.  I pray every day that they flourish in wake of the crumbled family unit that we had.  We have both moved on, remarried, had more kids, and yet, the negativity does not end.  I just do not get it.  It makes me sad for my children more than anything.  I personally do not care what someone thinks of me, but when we have to raise children together, it makes a difference how that person treats me in front of those children.  It changes who they are, Dr. Phil taught me that. 

So for Christmas this year, I want peace.  Peace of mind, peace of heart, peace of soul.  Not just for me, but for my children, and everyone.  I want peace, Santa do you hear me? 

The Lament of the Stay at Home Mom (or Dad)

I was just thinking about the way stay at home parents are regarded in society.  I feel like because I am at home people think that I have more time in my day than anyone else.  No, I still have the same seconds, minutes, and hours as anyone.  I just have several different types of activities I have to cram into that time efficiently.

I hear it all over the place, "Well, since you stay at home, you can do...." and, "It must be nice to be at home and not have to work."  Or one of my favorites, "I wish I could stay at home and do nothing."  Yes, me too.  Well, actually I do not wish to do nothing, that would be a lonely and boring existence.  I have to say though, my days are full.  I have two kids in school, and I try to volunteer there as often as possible.  I have a toddler at home who does not nap much, so she is with me almost all day.  She is precocious, and adorable, and active.  My day is full just with taking care of her, feeding her, nursing her, teaching her, molding her into a good and decent human being. 

That does not account for the time I spend with the admittedly neglected dog.  He is now acting like a toddler because he sees that type of behavior gets everyone's attention.  I am currently trying to communicate to him that he is not cute enough to get away with it, a point on which we do not see eye to eye.

Then there is the housework that I desperately try to stay on top of, and sometimes I succeed with flying colors, and other times I crash and burn.  There are the errands, school projects, chauffering the kids to their Dad's house and back on the weekends. 

I know some of you are saying, "Yeah well I do all that and I have a full time job."  To that I say, somewhere, somehow, someone is picking up some part of your life.  Whether it is childcare taking care of your child all day, a maid coming to help with housework, eating out more often because you are too tired to cook dinner.  Whatever it is, I say, there is a HUGE difference. 

I put a lot on myself, my husband will be the first one to tell anyone that.  I often feel like a huge financial burden, having to ask for money for things, when I used to be a single working mom I was the bank.  I controlled all income and spending.  I do not wish to control everything now, but I feel like I traded a piece of my independence to be at home.

So how did I conbat that?  I started a home business...go ahead, get the giggles out...I am currently an Independent Consultant for Arbonne, which is an amazing company with great products.  But my problem is finding the time, support, and did I mention time in which to do what I want with my fledgling business.  This company has amazing perks, products, and people.  I want nothing more than to make my business wildly successful.  But I cannot devote the time that I need to, why?  Because I will not allow myself to take that time from my family.  That is why.  That is it in a nutshell.  I will work around it as best I can until the baby gets older and I can devote more time to running a business. 

Stay at home parents often get a raw deal.  People have a tendancy to look down on us, like we are just lounging around doing nothing all day in the lap of luxury.  When in reality, sometimes I feel like I work in a sweat shop....but I would not trade it for the world.  I love my family, and all I really want is there unconditional love and acceptance in return. 

Real Illness or Hypochondriac?!?!

I am not sure if any of you out there have a child like mine, but I often have a hard time determining whether or not my middle child is actually sick or is being a hypochondriac.  She has always complained a lot of various things hurting her or not feeling well.  Most of the time just asking a few questions and paying a little special attention to her heals whatever is really ailing her, which I often think is middle child syndrome. 

Lately she has been complaining on and off of stomach aches.  She has complained a couple times that she has thrown up, but no one saw her, heard anything, and she was completely fine directly following her apparent vomitting episode.  But this past Sunday I finally got my proof that there is something going on. 

I picked the girls up from their dad's house, and upon arriving at home they got ready for bed.  A few minutes after bed time she came into my bedroom and complained that she had thrown up.  My husband got her settled back into bed, since I was nursing the baby.  The next morning I found some residue on the toilet seat.  She had eaten stuffed shells, so it was tinged red....which at first freaked me out until I questioned what she had eaten.  So, now I KNOW she has actually thrown up at least one time.

We have a doctor appointment this morning, and I am a little nervous.  My mother thinks it is a gall bladder issue.  I wonder if it is not something like reflux.  It seems like it is always something for her.  She has terrible allergy issues, she is a teeny tiny little thing, she has a double astigmatism, and is very near sighted, etc.  She is absolutely the sweetest, most loving, affectionate, emotional child around.  She will love anyone and everyone she meets.  I feel bad that often when she is complaining about not feeling well, "Mommy, my toe hurts, and my ear hurts, and my side hurts and my finger hurts," that I feel it is mostly attention seeking.  Her grandmother tells me her dad was the same way as a kid.

I just want my baby to be okay.  She is 8 but she will always be my baby.  So if you say prayers, can you say a little one for my sweet pea.  We would both be very appreciative.

My heart aches after reading this....

Please read THIS.  I had tears in my eyes after reading this.  My heart aches for anyone and everyone raising children with mental illness, and unable to find the help that they know they need. 

Please, reach out to other parents, especially if they are in need of extra love and support.  Do not let them go through this alone.  Lend them your shoulder, something.

I Sing Like Alicia Keys, And Look LIke Jennifer Aniston.

When my oldest child was a toddler she thought that Jennifer Aniston was me.  We would be in the grocery store and she would see a magazine cover with Jennifer on it, and she would start pointing and saying, "Mommy! Look, it's Mommy!"  People would oooh and ahhh over how cute it was.  I was incredibly flattered.  Well, today, her sister increased the ante.

On the way home from their dad's house we were listening to the radio and singing like we were on a stage in Madison Square Garden.  The new Alicia Keys song came on, "That Girl Is On Fire."  Well, we were giving it our best, and my 8 year old says to me, "Mommy, I cannot tell the difference between you and the singer!"  So, I have made a note to myself to get her hearing tested because obviously she cannot hear anymore.

No really, it was incredibly sweet.  Just as sweet as her blind sister that thought Jennifer Aniston was mommy oh so long ago.  The point here is this, my kids think I look and sound like beautiful, incredibly talented famous people.  Wait, no, that is not the point.  The point is that my girls look at me like the superstar in their lives.  Yes, that is my point.  It is an honor and a privilege to be their mother.  I love them so much.

Our kids hold us in the highest of regards.  They put us on a pedastel, and it is our job to earn that position.  We have to act like the people they perceive us to be.  Be the example of the person you wish to raise your child to be like.  Be there, listen, guide them, give them your time, your heart.  Let them know they too are the superstars in your life.  Teach them to sing out loud, heart and soul!

Adam Lanza

Yes, that is his name.  Adam Lanza.  This is the person that found the ability in his twisted, screwed up world to walk into an elementary school and murder innocent children and teachers.  That is his name, Adam Lanza.  Why he committed the crime that he did is still unknown, but I think the main point here is that he was deeply troubled.  In the article I linked to his name it states that he was known for showing no emotion, an outsider, a loner, and strange.  At least one person who went to school with him says that it was not a surprise that he did this. 

THAT is the problem with our country.  We have kids walking around through their lives, with something wrong inside.  They are saying that they could see that something was wrong with this person.  Why, why was he just walking around unstable, unemotional, waiting for the wrong thing to set him off?  I am not saying that any person who is anti-social should be locked up, but this kid had a history of instability.

I feel like this kid's village failed him.  I do.  I know many people are just condemning his heinous actions, and I am not trying to minimize the aftermath.  I just think that instead of solely focusing on gun control and whether or not to increase it, decrease it, or just plain enforce what we have, we need to look at our society's handling of mental illness.

We have to make something positive come out of this horror.  Our society has fallen off a much worse cliff than anything fiscal, we have fallen off a moral cliff.  We have lost control of what we allow our children to be expose to.  We have pushed aside those that need help, brushing it under the rug as they are just different.  Different is okay, but mentally unstable needs help!

We have to become accountable as a society.  We have to stand up for our morals and values, and not just talk about, we have to act on it!  We have to return to the days where neighborhoods were safe for kids to play in after school.  We have to return to the time when it was okay to have a disagreement with someone and not worry about them killing you in the street.  We have to return to a time where we respected human life, and cherished all of our kids. 

I implore parents everywhere to stand up and start working together.  We do not have to agree on every parenting aspect, it is okay if we do things differently than each other.  But we have to work together to raise our children in a healthy, thriving environment.  We have to take back our society, and say enough is enough.  Only we can do this, we on the front lines of our home towns.  We are the soldiers in this war.  We fight it with love, compassion, understanding, and most of all COMMUNICATION!!!

I challenge you, you reading this right now, to use your voice right now and state your role.  How are you going to change the world you live in today?  What is your first step in action?  How will you make your world a better place for your children, or your nieces/nephews, your cousins, your neighbors children, any and every child growing up in our society today? 

Christmas Presents...

I am curious to know what everyone is getting their kids for Christmas.  My 10 year old has told me that most of her friends either have or are getting a iPad....which boggled my mind.  She has a Kindle, and her 8 year old sister will be getting a Nook this year.  My oldest is getting a room makeover.  Her sister got one for her birthday in August and it made her older sister green with envy.  Beyond that they are getting books, nail polish, clothes, a couple arts and crafts type things, a board game or two, and that is it from us. 

I was curious what the most popular toys are this year, so I did a  little research and found out what many kids can expect under the tree.  It is a general list so there are some boy toys, some girl toys and a wide age range.  But these are some of the most popular items.  If your child is getting any of these, feel free to give a review once they have played with it. 

1. Leap Frog LeapPad 2.  This is a tablet for kids.  The joke is that it may help keep your kids away from your iPad.  Ummm, that is what high shelves are for, right??  Really though, it looks fun!  It is for ages 3 to 9 years old, which is AMAZING!

2.  HEXBUG Warriors.  This is a really cool looking item.  I do not have boys, or girls that play with HEXBUGS but I would give it a whirl if I did!!  This goes for ages 6 and up.

3.  Melissa and Doug Suspend.  This one looks really fun!  It is for ages 3 and up due to small pieces.  I might have to find this one for my girls.  They are constantly looking for new games to try.  I do not worry so much about the 15 month old getting, and eating, pieces but I do worry about the dog.

4.  Razor Flash Rider 360.  Okay, so I wish this was big enough for me to ride. HA!  I know what you are thinking, and yes, we should all thank God it is not.  This one looks really awesome.  It is for ages 6 and up, and will support up to 160 pounds.  So I guess technically it will support me, but ummm, let's not go testing weight limits. 

5.  Tegu Mobility Magnetic Car.  This will round out our top 5 of the most popular toys.  I have never heard of this one, so if someone has a review I would love for you to post it!!  This toy is for ages 3 to 15 years old.

Honestly, my kids are not picky at all.  They are fairly girly so makeup, jewelry, nail polish, lotions, hair stuff...all the usual stuff makes them happy.  Put that with a couple of odds and ends and one really awesome present and they are set to go.  The little one, yes, that is the one that is proving to be tough.  She is 15 months old, needs nothing, and her favorite thing to play with is her family.  She loves interacting with all of us, including the dog.  So I am having a heck of a time figuring out what to buy her.

Enjoy the company of your family this year, every year.  Enjoy each other, try not to stress, and remember to stop and love those kidlets.

Co-sleeping....

What we do with our 15 month old is what I call modified co-sleeping.  She naps every day in her own bed.  At night she sleeps mostly in our bed.  Last night she slept the whole night in our bed.  After the happenings of yesterday I needed the extra snuggle of my littlest angel.  I just had to listen to her breathing, see her chest moving up and down while she slept, just know that she was okay lying there next to me. 

Typically, she wakes up frequently.  She wakes up every 1-2 hours.  I start her off in her bed, and then at some point I move her to our bed so that she can continue to nurse and I can get some sleep.  I love her snuggly little self, but I also love having my spot back in the bed.  It's a tug of war every night.  At first I was being given greatly divided advice on co-sleeping.  I turned to Dr. Sears for information.   Upon reading the information I was so happy that I am NOT in fact screwing my child up forever.  I am NOT going to smother her, thank God.  She will actually be perfectly happy and healthy. 

That being said, I am working on getting her out of my bed.  Why?  Well, as I mentioned before I am not getting as good sleep as I was before her.  I have about half the space in the bed, which leads to me being awakened mroe frequently.  I have sleep issues to begin with so this is just adding to my sleep deprivation. 

I stay at home, and thus, am with my little one all day.  So being all day, and all night, I am having a little trouble with not having any time that is alone time.  Not that I would be alone, my hubby is in the bed too.  But I need to feel like I am not constantly in Mommy mode, even if I am.  It's psychological really.  But it is my reason and therefor valid enough. 

So there are benefits to co-sleeping.  Better sleep for parent and baby (I am the odd mommy out in this one apparently), better physiology for baby, decrease in SIDS, and better emotional health.  No one says co-sleeping is necessary for a well developed child.  But co-sleeping is certainly not detrimental to a baby's health and well being.

Co-sleeping is a personal, parenting choice.  I choose to do modified co-sleeping, and that works for our family. 

Attachment parenting

My mother and I were discussing attachment parenting today.  I would be considered an attachment parent.  She and I were discussing extreme behavior, after yesterdays tragedy it seems all people can discuss.  Anyway, I have a 15 month old, who still breastfeeds, who used to be in a carrier almost constantly, and who often finds her way into our bed.

My mom was recounting a story in which she heard of a mom who was breastfeeding her 4 year old, and who had all 4 of her children sleeping in bed with her and her husband.  In my opinion, this is more towards the extreme attachement parenting side of the scale.

My two older kids, 10 & 8 years old, sleep in their own rooms, in their own beds.  They were never big on co-sleeping because they move around a lot and they were not comfortable doing so.  This last little bit does not seem to have that issue.  That being said I am still working to get her into her own bed, why?  Because my hubby and I would ultimately like our bed back, and better sleep.  Sex can happen anywhere, we do not need our bed for that, but neither of us sleep as soundly when she is with us.  We are awakened by her frequently so it can be an issue.

I believe attachment parenting can be a great thing, when done with boundaries.  I do not believe it is healthy to have older children in the family bed.  I believe that people need some privacy, kids included.  I think that there needs to be some inner sense of independence.  I believe that constantly having someone on top of you leads to having issues with being alone.  I think that when kids do not learn how to occupy themselves ever, they can become needy and unable to function without someone else's input.

I wear my kids when they are infants, I breastfeed them until we both want to stop, and allow them in the bed when they really need it.  I also encourage independence, problem solving, and confidence every step of the way.  Attachment parenting is a balancing act, as is every type of parenting.  What works for some will not work for others.  We have to do what works for us and our children. 

I believe that we need to support one another in our efforts of raising good kids.  But in the same instance, we need to be open to someone questioning our practices.  If people do not ask, we do not have an opportunity to teach.  Do not become defensive when people question your methods, instead, look at it as an opportunity to open the eyes of someone to a potentially new and different way of doing something. 

Knowledge is power, and we all share in the ability to be teachers and students.  Instead of withdrawing we should bring all of our attributes to the table and share.  It takes a village to raise a child, and we all need to improve our villages!

Gun Control???

In the wake of the events in Connecticut yesterday many people are discussing our need for stricter gun control laws, but some are calling for LESS gun control.  I am respectful of EVERYONE'S opinion, but I completely disagree with this thinking.  I do not think that teachers should be able to carry a concealed weapon inside a school. 

I do not think ANYONE should be allowed to carry any weapon inside of a school.

The fact of the matter is this, there will be tragedy in our society.  The immediate gut reaction may be, "well if I was there and had been able to carry a concealed weapon, I would have shot him."  Unless you are in that exact situation with those exact circumstances, you have no idea what you would actually do. 

So are we supposed to allow teachers to carry weapons and just think that is not going to scare the hell out of the children?  What about the percentages of accidental weapon firings?  Are we going to be okay with that happening in a school?  What about kids that may find a weapon that is not concealed properly enough, because kids are curious and will seek to play with things that they find.

I think allowing any type of fire arms inside any school is asking for more trouble than it would potential diminish.  The right to bare arms was not designed for dealing with crazy weapons wielding people inside an elementary school.  Our forefathers could not have conceived of this type of action.  This did not happen then. 

I understand the anger and frustration driving this thinking.  I understand being completely disturbed by these events to the point of wanting to physically harm the person who did this, regardless of whether or not he is already dead. 

I think we need to focus on WHY these people are doing these horrible things.  What is the mental capacity of these people, and what is the responsibility of their friends and family to report anyone with this severity of mental illness.  I cannot imagine that this person was NOT mentally ill.  In order to walk into a school that his mother used to work in, and shoot innocent children, he HAS to be mentally ill.  Where was his family in this?   Where was his village of support?  THIS is where we have to combat these tragedies.

We need to ENFORCE the gun laws we have set in place.  Mentally ill people should never, ever have access legally to weapons.  We have laws regarding this and they often go uninforced.  Yes, there are other ways to get weapons, but if we make it as difficult as possible we increase our chances that some how this person will screw up their plan enough that someone will notice, and report them BEFOREHAND. 

I believe we need to protect our children above anything, but I do not agree that allowing teachers and staff to carry concealed weapons is the answer to this problem.  I believe it would further the problem even more.  Go hug your babies, and tell them you love them, because they cannot hear it often enough.