New Year's Resolutions

I am typically not a New Year's resolution type of person.  I usually just treat it like any other day, make myself stay up until midnight, say happy new year, and move on with my life.  This year I am going to make a couple of modifications to that routine.  I am going to put some goals out here, goal, not resolutions per se.

This year, I will find my niche.  Whether it is making jewelry, as an Independent Consultant with Arbonne, blogging, etc.  Whatever avenue I am destined to be pursuing, I will figure it out this year. 

I will be weaning my youngest this year.  She will be two years old in September, and it will be time at some point this year.  I have loved nursing her for an extended period, but I am really starting to want my body back. 

Speaking of my body....yeah, that ole thang.  I will commit to losing the last 10-15 pounds I want to lose this year.  For once and for all I will figure out how to combine diet and exercise instead of mastering them separately at different times.  I will combine the two for the body I always knew I had inside.

I am going to keep in better contact with family and friends.  It is hard when almost everyone is at a distance.  There are only so many hours in a day that I am available to talk on the phone.

And in that sentiment, I am going to increase my circle of local friends.  I am going to join MOMS Club in my area, and meet some new people with little ones the same age as my littlest princess. 

I am going to continue to work to make the situation between myself and my ex better.  That is a two way street, so I know I can only do so much to change things.  But I am going to do what I know is my best, so that I can continue to sleep well at night, well at least as far as that issue is concerned.

I vow to speak up more, and ask for help when I know I need it.  It is okay to stumble, it is okay to fall flat on my face.  As long as I pick myself up, dust myself off, and ask for a hand when I need it.  I am not Superwoman, and I will stop pretending that I am.

I will continue to work on bettering communication with my hubby.  Things are really good now, we seem to have a good system in place, and I will continue to do my part to keep things moving in a good direction so that we may always be a good example to ourselves and our kids on what a relationship should look like.

There are so many specific things I want for this year....more financial freedom, less stress, more creative endeavors, less drama.  I am sure of one thing, whatever is meant to happen, WILL HAPPEN. 

Happy New Year everyone.  I hope all of our dreams come true. 

Over Extended

You know, there is a stigma that stay at home Moms are lazy.  That we sit around all day Facebooking and blogging, neglecting our homes and our kids....hey wait, where't the baby???  KIDDING!  She's NURSING!  That is how I have a moment to blog. Anywho, I digress...

Do any of you stay at home Moms have issues with over extending yourself, mostly out of combatting the stigma of being thought of as lazy??  Do you sign up to do every party, bake every snack, contribute to every art project your kids have going on because you, "are home" and "have the time" to do everything under the sun?!?!  This is an affliction, I recognize this, and I quite frankly have this affliction myself. 

This week I have two class picnics to attend and contribute either snacks, toys, tent, or time too...if not all of the above.  I have to schedule a dr appt for the baby, I have to take my car in to be tuned up, I have dinner to cook, lunches to make, breakfasts, a house to keep clean, a dog to walk and pay attention to, and the baby...God bless her soul, my sweet baby who keeps me on my toes every second of the day that she is NOT nursing, or eating somehow.

I have a very busy life, and yet, I often feel like I could be doing more...not sure when I think this should be happening, but I do know it's all psychological.  I would go to counseling for it, but who has the freaking time?!?!

So I will continue to keep doing everything I can for the kiddos, and you know what, in the long run....they will look back and appreciate that they could always count on Mom to be there....even if it was just to bake some goodies.  They will look at their childhoods and recall me juggling everything I could just to make sure they know I love, support, and will be there for them as much as I can. 

That makes it all worth it. 

Okay, time's up, gotta run....

Ssssshhh, we're going to the zoo today.....

Yesterday my oldest daughter was talking about the zoo and the exhibits that were closed the last time we were there.  I was shocked she remembered the last time we were there, as I think it has been at least a year, maybe two since we went.  I was pregnant last year, and not feeling all that great, among many other things that had me not up to par. 

   So I asked her if she would be up for going on Sunday....and of course she said yes.  We have decided NOT to tell her 7 year old sister.  So after church this morning we are going to come home, change our clothes, and pack a small lunch, and leave.  I asked the oldest sister to keep the two younger ones occupied while I make some sandwiches and pack some snacks, to avoid being interrogated by the 7 year old.  Then I will declare we need to go to the store, and off we are headed to the zoo.  It is really an honor to live so close to our nation's capitol, and too many people do not take advantage of all that we have so nearby. 

So our adventure today is to the zoo...I love the zoo....I can't wait to post the reaction and aftermath of this trip.  It's the baby's first trip to the zoo!

Family Fun Night

              So last night was Family Fun Night at the girls' school. I took all three girls. The hubby stayed home, he wasn't feeling up to par, and had a really long day so I told him to just sit this one out and hang at home.  

Since coming to this school I have had a little bit of a hard time making friends.  I have made plenty of acquaintances, but real friends have been a little bit of an issue.  It's hard when you're coming into a group where most of the people have known each other for years, often the duration of the lives of their children.  Being the new Mom in town can make for a rough transition. 

Last night I talked to a few Moms that I see all the time, a few a rarely get a chance to speak with and even one or two that I have never met.  We were only there for a couple hours, but the girls had a blast, and I enjoyed the socializing.  I guess it was a success since my family had fun!

It did remind me though of how hard it has been to crack into this social scene.  It takes me right back to school when I would move and be the new kid.  It was so scary and intimidating to make new friends.  I am much more outgoing now than I was as a child and STILL it seems so frustrating.

Nevertheless, I had some great conversation last night, chatted up a friend about some fierce new shoes she was rockin', and the girls had a blast....so it was a success!

Avoiding the Rut

Once a woman becomes a Mom it is way to easy to fall into the rut of comfy clothes.  Yoga pants, t-shirts, tennis shoes, etc. can become way too commonly worn every day wear.  My children are 9 years, 7 years, and 7 months old.  I wear high heels, dresses, wedges, flip flops too.  I don't wear make-up too often, but my 7 month old has a love of kissing my face, and I would rather have the lovies than to be wearing make-up.  I keep it simple and comfortable, but still fashionable. 
My husband tells me frequently that I look amazing, yes he is biased, that is why I married him.  I take about 30-40 minutes, including shower, to get ready.  I have to blow dry my hair or else it looks a hot mess.  But as far as clothes go, I am always looking for what is simple, cute, and looks great on me....regardless of the trends.  I know my body, and what compliments my assets...ba dum dum.  I keep in mind that I am a nursing mother, but that I am also not wanting my boobs just out there. It isn't all that difficult to be a Mom with an infant, who doesn't nap let's not forget that, two school age children, not a lot of time, and STILL look good. 
I would love to be able to help other Moms stay looking good and avoid the yoga pants rut.  I don't spend a lot, keep it simple, and ALWAYS stick with what I know looks good on my body type!

Hunger Games

I have a question for you parents out there.  How young is too young for the Hunger Games book/movie?  It is rated PG-13, so obviously the movie industry feels that 13 is an appropriate age, unless accompanied by a parent. 

My 7 year old 2nd grader came home today complaining that several of her classmates were playing a new game called, Hunger Games.  I asked her what they were doing, and she said they were pretending to use weapons and kill each other.  Now, I am not naive, but I had hoped that my 7 year old would be for a little while yet.

My 9 year old said her classmates are obsessed with the Hunger Games, and she quite frankly is sick of it....I love that kid.  I will also say, my kids go to a private, Catholic School.  I don't know if I am wrong in expecting more because of this, but I do, and my bank account says that I have a right to, since all my money goes to them. 

So, I want to hear from parents, what are your thoughts on the Hunger Games, what is old enough for the book and/or movie?  Do you think that I shouldn't be at all surprised that 7 & 8 year olds are enacting the concept on the playground?  Should I mention it to the teacher?  Or am I just being an overconservative prude?  Go ahead, give me your honest opinion...

Moving Past A Troubled Childhood....

I found this article through CNN, and found it really interesting.  I had a troubled childhood, went through years of therapy.  Reading this article made me smile, as many of the tips resonated with me. 

7 tips for moving past a rotten childhood

By Tracy McMillan, Oprah.com

April 13, 2011 9:56 a.m. EDT

STORY HIGHLIGHTS

• In order for your life to change, you have to want things to be different, author says
• Think of every dollar you save as a step away from people and places that have kept you down
• Channeling your anger will get you a long, long way in life, author says

RELATED TOPICS

• Self-Help
• Culture and Lifestyle

(Oprah.com) -- Author Tracy McMillan knows a thing or two about getting over a bad childhood. Her father was a drug-dealing pimp and convicted felon who spent most of his daughter's life behind bars. Her prostitute mother gave her away.
Here's what she wants you to know about getting over your past.
1. Get a new story
There are two ways for me to look at my childhood story. In one, I'm a person who is so unloved and unwanted, my own mother gave me away.
In the other, I was born, took a look around at my prostitute mother and criminal father, and said to myself, "I can totally do better than this. Get your stuff, we're leaving." In one I'm a victim, in the other, I'm in power.
Guess which viewpoint got me the career I have today?
Oprah.com: The man who got away (thank goodness!)
2. Realize blame = same
Blame is awesome. It feels good, right? It feels righteous. It feels powerful. It feels like someone's going to pay for what they did to you.
The only problem is -- as long as you're blaming -- nothing can ever change. Why? Because in order for your life to change, you have to want things to be different.
And if it feels good to blame, you have to admit that you like it. And if you like it, you have to admit that you don't really want it to change. Which is why blame just gets you more of the same.
3. Pretend you work at a retail store
Sometimes, I look at my bad childhood like it's an unruly customer and I'm working customer service the day after Christmas. It'll be acting up, moaning and complaining about how hard everything is, and how unfair it all is.
I just have to say to it, "Yes, I see you, ma'am. I know you have a problem. But right now I'm busy, so please have a seat. I''ll be with you just as soon as I can."
Then I do something productive that will actually change my situation, like go to work.
Oprah.com: 18 habits from childhood that affect your relationships now
4. Accept the fact that some don't really want you to succeed
This sounds harsh, and it is. But it's true.
Some of your family and friends "support" you by cosigning all your b.s. about how hard you have it, because if you succeed, two things will happen:
1) You will leave. And 2) They will be left behind.
This doesn't mean you have to get rid of your friends and family, you just have to remember that they love you so much, they're perfectly happy for you to stay exactly where you are right now.
5. Decide to KSA (Kick some ass)
When my 13-year-old said he hated science class, I told him that getting a 95 on the test was the equivalent of getting in the face of his least favorite teacher and saying, "Have some!"
In other words, kicking ass on the test is just like playing a video game. Needless to say, he's getting As now. Channeling your anger will get you a long, long way in life.
Oprah.com: 10 life lessons you should unlearn
6. Hoard your money
The number one way to end your bad childhood is to save money. I have a very simple rule about money: If I never spend everything I make, I will always have money. And money is power.
All those commercials you see are a big, rich company's attempt to get you to give them your power. Don't do it! Think of every dollar you save as one step away from the people and places that have kept you down.
7. Get a paper route
In fifth grade, I wanted a 10-speed bike like all the other kids had. So I started delivering papers when I was 11. In Minnesota. In the winter.
Compared to that, every job I've had since has been easy. While there may not be papers to deliver in the snow, the point is to do the thing you don't want to do.
Get a hard/crappy job and do it until the voices in your head stop telling you that you can't take it another minute. Everything after that will be cake, and your bad childhood will be over. I promise.
Oprah.com: Tracy McMillan's secret for getting over a bad breakup

Tracy McMillan is a film and television writer, most recently on AMC's "Mad Men." Her memoir, "I Love You and I'm Leaving You Anyway" is a comic, tragic, unflinchingly real, and ultimately victorious true story of how one woman learned to love herself no matter what.