So about this whole "I'm fat," thing....

There was a story a while back where a mom outlawed use of the word fat around her child or something like that. I thought she was a little kooky for it, but hey, it was all out of love and efforts to protect her daughter.

Yesterday, I got to thinking. Maybe she has something. I mean, outlawing a word around your child will only work for so long, like until your kid goes to school. But I know I frequently refer to myself as feeling fat, or my fat ass, or something along those lines.

Now, while I am joking, mostly, I am beginning to wonder if one of my daughters would ever begin to take my comments personally, because she is build like me. So I have to wonder if she considers herself fat?? I know she has commented on being short, but hey that is beyond anyone's control. She is not short, she is average, but most of her classmates are ABOVE average. So she feels short.

One time she did make a comment about wanting to exercise more, to be in better shape. I asked her how much better shape she could possibly be in, because she looked pretty in shape to me. She pointed out her slight little tummy. The only place on her body where she has any body fat. Which is exactly how I referred to it.

She has a tendency to have the highest of expectations of herself, a bit anal retentive at times. She is a control freak to the utmost. She is a first born daughter. She strives academically, knows everything there is to know and will share it with anyone who needs to be told.

She also has a heart of gold, is the most well-behaved child I could have EVER asked for, and is so naturally beautiful it is almost scary. She is as smart as they come, as driven as they come, and as amazing as the come.

I think I will stop referring to my fat ass, my feeling fat, and whatever else I do to knock myself down. I think my own ego and hers will be all the better for it.

Pre-Teens

My oldest daughter is 10 years.  I know some may not think of that as being pre-teen, but trust me she is very mature for her age....sometimes I think she is a 10 year old in a 25 year old body.  That being said, I have had to come to grips with entering a new phase of parenthood.  Discussing hormones, body changes, and puberty.  Let me just say now, I would rather be hit with a sock full of nickles than to discuss sex with my child.  But I have to, it is the responsible thing to do. 

First, it was the period talk.  I sat her down and discussed what happens in a girls body as she grows and changes.  I talked boobs, hair growth, menstration....it was painful, but I made it through.  Then I swore her to secrecy until she has to discuss this with her children.  Well, maybe not that kind of secrecy, but I told her not to tell her sister.  I also told her that this was something that parents discuss with their kids and not to say anything at school because it is up to her friends' parents to talk about this with them.  So far, no one has called to curse me because my child told their kid about the facts of puberty.

The next topic of discussion, sex.  Oh. My. Gosh.  Just smack me now.  She came home the other day saying that a boy in her class was making a joke about something tickling his pickle.  She said he had to explain to her what that meant.  Now I know I have to have the sex talk with her.  I cannot have fellow fifth graders sharing with her the misinformation about sex that only fifth graders could share.

I am trying to work up the courage for this one.  I would love some advice, book recommendations, a life line....something to make this easier.  I know all parents should be having this conversation with their kids, but I know many do not.  Mostly out of embarrassment, I think.  We need to realize that we are not doing our kids any favors by not discussing things with them.  They will find out one way or another, and they should learn from a reliable source, their parents.

So, after I psych myself up I will take the plunge into the abyss that is the sex talk with my child.  I better get used to it, there are two more after her.  Maybe I will practice on the dog.  He does not understand anyway so I cannot traumatize him too badly.

Someday I will look back on this and laugh....someday.